“We spend January 1st walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives ... not looking for flaws but for potential.”
- Ellen Goodman
I really feel this quote. Most January’s I spend time thinking about the areas of my life I need to ‘fix’ or perfect - I don’t think I’m the only one who feels the pressure of having to set resolutions, goals, targets. Don’t get me wrong - I think goals are great and they keep us on track but the pressure to have a list of actions to be completed in the new year ready by 1st of January is just exhausting. Especially if you don’t really know what those actions should be, because you’re still figuring out what it is that you want and what will make you happy.
2019 was a hard year for me. I thought about telling you guys exactly what happened, but then I realised that revisiting all the events which led to me being exhausted, upset, quite frankly depressed was a waste of my time and my energy. The year is gone, what I’m taking from it is that I have conquered every avalanche which hit me throughout the year - and trust me there were plenty. By the end of the year I honestly started to lose sight of the light and happiness in my life. I simply had no energy to carry on anymore. I kept going through the hard times, but I stopped trying to push myself to the point of a breakdown, and by the end of the year I started to see a glimmer of that light I’ve been missing - so I took a two week break from the business, from social media, from blogging, even from social events to enjoy things happening around me. That really helped.
dress* by FemmeLuxe Finery
I stepped into the new year feeling an abundance of positivity in my life: abundance of love from my family and my fiancé, abundance of joy and care which my friends bring to me, abundance of positive energy flowing through our new home, abundance of good food and indulgent drinks, abundance of money (even though I’m completely broke after buying a house, Christmas, and paying my self-employed tax!). I think I have finally got the concept of abundance as positive energy and it’s been flowing through me these past couple of weeks.
I stepped into the new year feeling grateful for everything I have in my life. Instead of seeing things as a burden or constantly having an end goal in mind which just keeps getting pushed and pushed, I worked with my coach to realise that this is life. There is no finish line - it’s the process which I should enjoy and be present for. That’s when it clicked I think and I stopped running towards a goal which just kept moving further away from me.
I stepped into 2020 achieving my biggest dream of 2019 - we are now homeowners of a gorgeous little home, in a quiet location right next to the countryside and beautiful spacious fields; my relationship is back on track after a more than rocky couple of years; we have welcomed a new fur baby to our family so we are now double dog parents; I’m working with clients and brands which I love and believe in; I am inspired about both of my businesses and it was great to appear on BBC Radio Solent with Dalry Rose Styling in the first week of January; and I have gotten my passion back for my blog working with some fantastic brands - like FemmeLuxe who have kindly sent me the Pink Glitter One Shoulder Puff Sleeve Bodycon Dress I'm wearing, which is the perfect going out dress! I like the subtle sparkle, the colour and the design of this dress - one puff sleeve helps to make my arms look slimmer, and the body con shape with ruches is super flattering.
I have troubles finding the right going out dress because so many of them are ultra short - but this one is the perfect length for me. It’s still fun and flirty, but I can also bend down to pick something up without exposing myself to the whole room! So this dress gets a big thumbs up from me - not only does it look great at festive parties, but also with a tan during a late summer evening of cocktails!
Whilst I still haven’t written down and set in stone my goals for the year - but I know that this year I’m making myself and my time a priority because I don’t want to see my life float by in a ball of rush and frustration - instead I want to enjoy unravelling the challenges and celebrate every tiny success that comes my way.
I’d love to know if you have set yourself goals already or if you’re feeling the slow and calm start of the new year?
*This post includes gifted items in partnership with FemmeLuxe. All views are my own.
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